excuses

Well, it’s been a long month and a half. The DayJob has been a time suck and emotional drain. Due to circumstances beyond my control I had to work extra hours and some very strange shifts. It ended up being stressful and difficult. I often tried to work on books during those weeks but I ended up making beginner mistakes and ended up screwing up several books. So I decided that I would only work on books while I was rested and able to devote my full attention to the process. Thus I didn’t work much. My days off were spent resting and doing housework, because no matter what that fun stuff always needs to be done.

All in all I learned a lot about myself in these weeks. What? I need a regular schedule, preferably something starting at 7am or 8am and ending around 4pm. I also learned that I need 8-hour shifts and 40 hours a week. I don’t deal well with stress especially work related stress. Not knowing what’s happening with my job sends me into a state of panic and thus stress. As soon as I get stressed it affects my mood, which affects my ability to work on books. In short I need a DayJob again. My DayJob has gone from a relatively stress free work environment to one filled with stress and issues I need to deal with on a moment-to-moment basis. I want something where I go in, do my job and come home. When I come home I don’t want to get a call from work and need to deal with more garbage from work.

I’ve been close to quitting on several occasions. I’m a florist; my job shouldn’t be stressful. However, that is not the case. Obviously it is stressful. I’m not exactly sure what makes this job so stressful lately, but it has been. Certain things about work have been making it worse. I won’t go into specifics here but there are certain things about it that push me to the edge. I’ll eventual figure out what I’d like to do with myself.

To add to all the work stress my partner and I are looking for a place to call home. We’ve found several places we like but not in areas that we like. Sadly we haven’t found something in a town we love. It’s a stressful process to look for a place to live and thus far it’s been a decent process. Not too stressful. The hard thing for us is that we need a place with room for a studio. WE did find one place that we loved, beautiful place, lots of space, but in a terrible area.

Overall, I’ve been tired, ill and house hunting. Hopefully, my health will be better, work will even out and soon we’ll find a house and you’ll see more books and more posts.

Good stuff

So it’s been awhile, forgive me if you can, otherwise, aww shucks c’mon….

I’m planning a more substantial post about all that fun stuff soon, possibly tonight, but to tide you over some books.

I’ve been working on and off lately on some custom orders, below you’ll see some pictures of more renaissance journals, slightly different from those before, but not much.

Enjoy.

Out of COntrol

Everyone will have to forgive me for going AWOL over the last few weeks. Work has been hellish and I’ve been there a lot. When I haven’t been at the DayJob I’ve been sleeping. In addition to being at work a lot I’ve been fighting off a “wicked nasty” sinus infection. I feel like the worst of it has abated and that I can finally move on with my life. Nothing worse than being sick in a way that doesn’t really show itself other than a runny nose and flushed cheeks. I need a good 4 days off in a row some time soon so that I can rest and recuperate from the BS at work. It’s been a trial. I’ve been very close to quitting on several occasions and the only thing that has stopped me is not being able to pay rent.

I’ve been painting a lot in my moleskine, little sketches, thoughts on work, life events and the media. It’s all I can do with all that’s going on to keep creative.

I have done a few books over the last few weeks. I’ll post some pictures when I have the time. I only have one day off in the next week and a half thought hopefully I’ll get some half days.

(Title is from a She Wants Revenge song. If you like depeche mde at all check them out. It's a little darker than I usually go with my music but very very good.)